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Summers are scary. Specially weekdays. Specially when you are trying to change the world in a little way possible. Specially when it involves learning coding to high standards. Specially when you are unemployed. Specially when you end up waking up as late (yes late) as 8 am.

When you are sitting pooping, with your dumb smart phone in hand and scrolling down an Instagram feed you do not even know half the people in. The sound of the summer birds are a screeching reminder that you are late again, late to start changing the world. Late to learn, late to fill the gaps of disappointments. This kills me.

It’s poetry month and I thought I’d stick to the prompts that a poetry page in India is giving everyday. The prompts are not very, shall I say, aligning. Sometimes I do not even know what to write about on it. As much as it is a creative challenge, it’s a pain in the mind. How am I supposed to write a poem with the first line, that is the first line of my favorite song when I do not know what my favorite song is. 5 steps to make a human. Bridges. Whaaaat!

Perhaps, it’s just that I’m so convinced that I can turn this idea that I’ve left my job for into reality in 5 months, and present it on a TEDx stage in my alma mater, that I can’t/don’t want to focus my time on reading and writing, something that comes very naturally to me. But right now, they feel like a small child pulling your T shirt to take you to a window shop where he/she/they wants to buy a car and you can’t spare that time because you are doing something you always thought you would. Could.

Writing and reading are part of a dream. The thing that I’m trying to make, trying to solve a problem, is well, a hard problem that I’m out to solve. It’s no dream. It’s just that I feel so intensely about it, and the fact that nobody has ever tried to solve it, nor probably ever will, makes me want to solve it quicker and better all the more.